Fighting my nature vs finding my nature

Finding my kite

I want to be a better person

This thought comes to many of us at some point in our lives. Sometimes not just once but in many different circumstances and on multiple points of lifetime line. An idea to improve, to fight all the weaknesses, to set targets and do everything to get what we want. If these goals are positive, all our efforts seem to be right. We’re working on being better than we are right now. Sounds good?

Myself in the future

When we get into that mindset, all our thoughts are focused on the image of ourselves in the future. On the person we want to become one day, in the next month, a year or 10 years from now. Someday I’ll be perfect. I’m learning, improving, doing one million activities to be that amazing, wonderful human being. Some day. Does it still sound good?

Myself now

All that focus on self-improvement to achieve those ambitious goals have often one common characteristic – we are not entirely happy right now. The more unhappy we are, the bigger need for change. We may want to improve our look, physical strength, want to be healthier, get a better job, bigger house, be better partner / parent and so on. Although all that seems to be right at the first glance, it often comes from our internal feeling that we aren’t good enough in these areas. In other words – we don’t accept who we really are at present moment. But we’re going to be perfect one day and we’ll be happy.

Fighting my nature

If all mentioned above is true, if we don’t accept our imperfect nature, we put ourselves in the constant fight. Fight against ourselves. But the nature of every battle is that someone must lose. If we undertake the battle against ourselves, who will eventually lose that skirmish?

Finding my nature

Have you ever met one person who was entirely perfect? Not for a moment but perfect all the time?

What would you say about one crazy idea to switch focus from weaknesses to strengths? To all our positive sides, everything what’s good in us RIGHT NOW? (I wrote about here and now in previous article: Be here, be now. Why mindfulness is bad for you.) What about other crazy idea to accept that all those weak points as simply part of our nature? Like we accept that day and night or Summer and Winter are part of the nature around us. The truth is, we are entirely complete with all our traits – if we want to get rid of unwanted ones, we risk losing our internal integrity. With acceptance of our true nature, we have that completeness. We’ve got happiness – not some day but here and now. There’s nothing more to do, really.

So, would that mean self-improvement is a wrong idea?

Yes. When we think of it as a way to change ourselves because we don’t accept who we are and try to be someone else. That is illusion, something distant and unreal. We can chase that entire life and live in misery forever.

And no. When we undertake any activities in line with our nature, not against it, any efforts can just multiply joy and happiness we already have. We’re improving then naturally, it’s no longer a fight but fun. If you do anything like playing instrument, painting, programming, blogging, running or anything else just because you like it, go for it. Enjoy it. Improvement will come as side effect, but your happiness will no longer depend on it.

Be here, be now. Why mindfulness is bad for you.

Finding a Tree

Be where? Beware.

Have you ever walked looking into your mobile and almost hit someone or something accidentally? Or maybe, if you’re not so attached to this small device – did it happen to you that your thoughts were so far away that you barely noticed what was around you? Just be honest. It happened to me, it happened to everyone, at least once in a lifetime. Or let’s be really honest – that happens more often then we realise – during long journeys, boring meetings but also during many usual activities which we tend to do on autopilot. The point is, we’re not fully here at those moments. Physically – yes, mentally – not at all. Our thoughts are in much more interesting places.

Here.

All those places where our mind wander have one common characteristic – our presence there is not real. For some reason we choose to be in these imaginary locations, forgetting entirely of the place where we really are at the moment – here. That would mean, we’d rather be somewhere else, with different people, doing something we don’t do right now. And we keep thinking about that, thinking that it could make us happy. The biggest trap of our mind – illusion, that we need to keep searching for happiness, as it’s always somewhere else. Never here, never now. And never truly real. Beware.

Now.

Do you remember that time when your life was wonderful? Or, if you think it’s never been – do you imagine that it could be in the future (find something about planning here: Planning is great, but…)? Have you ever spent time thinking of these past moments? Dreaming about future happiness which could appear one day? Another biggest trap – illusion, that whatever best for us already happened or hasn’t happened yet. In both cases, it’s definitely not now.

Mindfulness.

If you’ve decided to read this article, it’s quite likely that you’ve already started to be aware that something with this mind wandering is wrong. So, mindfulness is all about that awareness. About being present. Realising that the only reality we’ve got is here and now. And that here and now absolutely nothing is wrong. It may be hard to believe but I’ll give more light on that in other articles. Or, if you’ve got some experience in this area – leave a comment, reading them is always inspiring.

It’s bad for you.

If you decide to live here and now, you can lose all that extraordinary times and places where your mind feel comfortable. You’ll detach yourself from the bright future and wonderful past and from all those amazing places and activities you’re thinking of. That’s a lot to sacrifice and majority of people are not ready for it. I’m not entirely sure if I am myself.

Or is it?

Changing our mindset to be always focused on present moment can lead to amazing discoveries. It allows to realise that we don’t really need to look back or wait for miracles to happen. That we can be happy just now. That we’ve got everything we need, although we tend to ignore that. It’s about opening eyes and starting to notice what a great world we’ve got around – just now. Is it worth to give it a go?

Finding my Nature

Finding my nature in Lake District
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New blog? Finding my nature?

Yes. I’m experimenting with writing. Sometimes. I’ve always thought that as human beings we need some form to express our thoughts and feelings. Writing is one of those forms. And now it takes shape of the very first article on “Finding my nature” blog.

I like to talk a lot. Sometimes. I thought that blogging would be great a idea then. So, there was an idea to create “Fashion but how?” blog. Little bit of fun, little bit of business, little bit of serious stuff – everything. That blog died in year 2018 when I promised to not give up. But I did.

Or maybe not – I’m still alive, typing here.

My journey, our journey

We spend our lives doing a lot of different things – some of us have clear vision where we want to go, have clear goals and plan how to achieve them. And life consists of ticking off all boxes on that plan. Easy stuff. Some of us are experimenting, trying new things, evaluating what’s really important, looking for deeper meaning in all of this. Complicated stuff. On that journey we either know our inner nature or keep searching for it. And keep finding it.

Inside

When I realised that not everything in my life is as it should be, that I didn’t fit here or something here was totally wrong, I started to look around. And I wasn’t happy about all the World around me. As I’m a man of action, I couldn’t just wait for changes, I made changes to happen. Some of them were small, like trying to survive without coffee (https://findingmynature.com/10-days-without-coffee), some quite radical, like moving to other country. All of them were directed outside. So, effects of those actions were only outside too.

Then I realised that true changes must happen inside me, and I started to put more attention into my inner self. Into my thoughts, feelings, intentions and my real nature. I discovered that I really need to find and understand what’s inside me. So, this was beginning of true changes. Beginning of finding my nature and attempt to live according to it. Not trying to change the World around me anymore.

Outside

My other discovery appeared during time of writing previous blog – I could have no fresh ideas for new articles but I continued with associated Instagram account. Blog was intended to be about business, but Instagram ended up as collection of pictures of our beautiful nature around us. And I realised that’s what I really enjoy – contact with nature, amazing places and photography a form of art. To not be always too serious, you can find there some selfies as well. So, this is another dimension of finding nature – the one around us as.

Old blog?

I moved some articles here although my views have changed slightly since the time of writing them. But that will be topic for another article.

What next?

Spiritual journey and pictures of nature, as simple as that.